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State of the Union Drinking Game
JonStewart
vanaabegra
From http://www.drinkinggame.us/





EVENT

# of Drinks

Every time he says....


“The state of our union is strong…” (or some version of this)

1
+1 if he breaks down in tears

"the American people"
1

troops

small 1

surge
quick 1
Iraq
1
Baghdad
1
"sectarian violence"
1 Car Bomb
recipe

Iran

1

terror (however it’s pronounced)

small 1

detainees

1, with your hands behind your back

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
2 (+1 if he pronounces it correctly)

Saddam Hussein or Saddam

1

elections
1 if referring to another country's
2 if referring to the 2006 midterms
freedom
1
Homeland
1 if followed by "Security"; 2 if another context
"Bring it on"
Arm-wrestle the person next to you; loser drinks

“nukular”

1

bipartisan or bipartisanship

2 (+1 if followed by giggle or chuckle)

"addicted to oil"

shot of extra-virgin olive oil

Medicare or Medicaid
wait a really long time to get a drink you really need
education
1 (+1 if mispronounced)
"human-animal hybrid"
What do centaurs and mermaids drink, anyway??
"illegal immigration"
1 shot of cerveza/tequila

God (or any euphemism for God)

 2

sacrifice
1 - in the context of the armed forces
2 - for civilians
"fiscal discipline" or "smaller government" or "responsible government"
if you're a:
  • congressman/lobbyist: Cristal, laugh derisively
  • private/other public sector employee: Andre, look glum
  • "tax burden"

    1

    hydrogen

    shout "Oh, the humanity!", take 1 shot

    ethanol*
    * With all of the ethanol "serious players" of this game will consume, they will be their own alternative energy source by about 10pm.

    We think you can figure this one out...

    evil or evildoers
    2
    Ban Ki Moon
    shot of kimchi-infused vodka
    Mark Foley
    one shot of Scotch, aged 16 years
    "macaca"
    Invite George Allen for a drink - he doesn't have anything better to do...

    "Don't mess with Texas!"

    Locate the nearest Texan; mess with him/her; then drink

    Every time he....


    praises a Democrat by name

    1

          ....if that Democrat is not Joe Lieberman
    3
    uses a Bushism (i.e. says something that's not really a word, other than “nukular”)
    1
    references a mistake he/his administration has made
    pinch yourself, take shot to ease the confusion and disbelief
    announces a new initiative
    1

    Every time the camera shows....


    the First Lady

    1

    your congressman/woman

    1
    and pat yourself on the back for being able to identify your congressman/woman

    John Kerry
    Pour yourself a shot and drink it, unless, because of your lack of education, you "might get stuck in [the bottle]"
    Barack Obama
    1, with hopeful audacity
    Ted Kennedy
    drink until your liver cries
    a close-up on Nancy Pelosi (without the president in the shot)

    1 shot, taken without moving any facial muscles
    +1 if surrounded by children

    Nancy Pelosi and Dick Cheney...and only one is applauding
          +1 if it looks like they're kicking each other under the desk

    1

    Tom Tancredo, announced presidential candidate
    10 pesos-worth of tequila, yell something in Spanish
    a "special guest" who is introduced by the President

    1

    a "special guest" who is a member of the armed forces
    1

    a standing ovation from HALF of Congress

    1

    Other


    if the speech is under an hour

    Finish your drink and have another beer

    DEMOCRATIC RESPONSE BONUS GAME


    any reference to the 2006 midterm elections

    1

    if you’ve never heard of the Democrat delivering the response

    1

    any mention of how the Dems hope to ride roughshod over President Bush

    1

    if he starts laughing uncontrollably

    Dems: join in the laughter
    GOP: sob, reservedly
    Both: 2 shots
    Greens & Independents: Still no drink for you!

    if he references his military service and/or pulls off his shirt and starts flexing

    grunt, drink, smash beer can on forehead




    • 1
    Dammit! Now we're going to have to watch the damn thing.

    Are you hosting a party to watch the damn thing? Cause that is the only way I am going to.
    I had a long political discussion with a customer where I very nearly converted her to Libertarianism. I did impress her with my ecconomic education and world view. It was all sparked by the voice of the shrub on the radio. It got her steaming.

    • 1
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